Monday, November 21

things you have to explain to men

You ever notice how there are certain inane things that women understand that men just don't "get" one could argue that it is simply cuz women are insane ... and so therefore in order to import order into our lives.. we create all these things that only we understand... which could be true.. but that is besides the point... our mistake however.. is assuming that men will understand them as well.... now some men ..for whatever reason are in tune to these things.. and "get" them... (and no I'm not just talking about the gay men).. 

One of these things is our rationalization in regards to food... as women we are always concerned with what we are putting into our bodies.. even if we don't exercise regularly or even generally eat healthy.. we still are always thinking in the back deep recesses of our brains ... how "bad" a certain food is.. or how "good" another food is... for example.. fruit is good.. it's healthy.. the fact that we classify fruity pastries in this catagory is neither here nor there... heh.. whereas foods like cheesecake ..on some days depending on how delusional you are that day .. might be considered good due to the fact that it falls into the "dairy" catagory.. but most of the time.. it's a "bad" food... 

Although... there is one thing we can do in regards to these particular foods that is amazing.. and it's usually one thing you need to explain to men.. 

Women understand ...whether it is true or not .. that if you add enough fruit to cheesecake.. it's not considered a dessert anymore... and is therefore inately healthy.

(I know.. we're delusional retards... but it's our delusion.. so SHOOSH)

When you attempt to explain this to men..... they usually give you the face that dogs get when you talk to them in that high pitched baby-talk voice.... they cock their heads to the side.. and give you a look of utter confusion like you just attempted to explain to them the third series in Maxwell's equations... (hehe.. go physics.. I knew my education would come in handy eventually)..

Often.. they will follow up that confused "dog" look.. with a statement like, "but ..what does it make it then... an entree or an appetizer?".. 

*rolls eyes*

Now.. I know all the women out there reading this are smacking their hand on their forehead just thinking... "doh!" .. in that infamous Homer voice.. and yes ladies I know you're thinking that it's not that hard of a concept to grasp... but remember.. this is just one of those things that you need to explain to men.


  1. A woman in my office brought what she called a "salad" to our potluck last week. When she was telling me what she contributed I could not find it on the table. Strawberry fruit salad? WTF? Where? It turned out to be a jello, whipped topping, strawberry mixture spread into a graham cracker pie crust.

    I said, "I don't know what you're talking about all I see is a pie."

    She got pissed off and said "It's a SALAD. I AM A DIABETIC!"

    Even I couldn't understand THAT rationalization.

  2. ok... it has to have more fruit than other ingredients to be "healthy" ... lol

  3. So love the post!!!! So true....I am glad that I am not the only one who rationalizes like that.