Tuesday, November 29

soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur


Kitty, I don’t need help to go to the bathroom.

“meow?”

Kitty, I’ve given you loves… what else do you want?

“meow?”

Are you hungry? Do you need water? (cleans and refills water dish. Gives kitty a treat) There… happy now?

“meow?”

Fuck you kitty.




(putting on pants in the morning, notice that there is about a pound of cat hair on them)

Kitty… I just brushed  you last night.. how is this possible?

“meow?”

Seriously… how can you have your winter coat.. ALL YEAR LONG?

“meow?”

I swear… I’m shaving you bald. Would you like that?

“meow?”

Nevermind.




(walking down the hallway to the bathroom first thing in the morning, suddenly a black mass of fuzz comes zooming past almost knocking me over)

Kitty… is it really necessary for you to beat me to the bathroom door?

“meow?”

No really… you almost killed me…. again.

“meow?”

Do you even feel sorry?

“meow?”

One of these days kitty, one of these days.




(laying in bed and two seconds later two kitties are crawling on top of me purring)

Can I at least get my cell phone plugged in before I get mobbed?

“meow?” “meow?”

Kitty.. that is my boob you’re laying on.

“meow?”

No.. it hurts kitty. Get off!

“meow?”

(gently pushes kitty off………………………………………….. a minute later kitty is back in the same spot)

I swear we just had this conversation.

“meow?”

I give up.

13 comments:

  1. Wait, did you just watch the old episode of Big Bang Theory where Sheldon teaches Penny that song, too?? It was JUST on some local station here.

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  2. SOft Kitty, Warm Kitty, Little Ball of Fur... Love Big Bang Theory... hate cats... well until I had one... but it ran away and so now I hate cats again

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  3. For whatever reason the Presidents of the United States of America song Kitty was playing in my head the whole time I read this. How did you do that?

    What loyal and adoring pets you have. :-)

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  4. I love this post. I think our cats must be related... I have the same conversations with mine... and I get no where either!!! Glad I am not alone. :)

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  5. Awww...I like it when my kitty lies on my boob.

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  6. @Gia - I was just too tired and lazy to think up a title for this.. and I love that show.

    @Mandy - you need a new kitty... one who stays indoors

    @mark - if by loyal and adoring you mean lovely yet annoying.. then yes.

    @Tere - it's a daily struggle.

    @wagthedad - hahaha... perv.


    Just so everyone knows... despite my bitching about my cats.. I love and adore them and can't imagine my life without them.

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  7. my kitty finished eating his breakfast then tried walking onto my chest as I was on the computer. I said to him "Get off, ass. You smell like cat food." He don't even care.

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  8. Just a friendly little cat.

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  9. As the somewhat resident cat lady around here I must say, these are totally normal conversations lol. Is it sad I know each of my cats' habits and cater to them instead of trying to change them to my liking? "Oh here, Little, let me lie on my side so you can sit on me." "No Mr., don't sit there, that's Mama's spot," (Mama is the nickname of one of the girls). Mine are a little family, (as you know) so maybe I think the pride will gang up on us one day and eat us lol :). I swear they trip us on purpose.
    What would life be like without them though? Definitely not as funny :).

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  10. purr purr purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

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  11. What is it with cats and boobs? I swear sometimes my nipple has a target on it...

    Cute post - would love to see of pic of said furball!

    signed,

    mom of one spoiled-rotten furry faux-child

    p.s. the furminator is an AWESOME comb for fuzzy cats. I have no financial interest in the company - swear! - but it takes a ridiculous amount of fur off - gets all that undercoat stuff that never seems to stop shedding, too

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  12. Aw, this made me miss my cats. Almost makes me want more. But not quite. Now that I'm cat-hair-tumbleweed-free, I won't ever go back. Also, M is allergic.

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