Monday, December 12

a list that makes you grateful you don't live my life...

it's like I'm a fucking saint, yo.... helping others be grateful for their own lives just by the simple fact that they don't live my shitstorm of a fucking existence.

So..... it's Monday. What does that mean?
Well... not much for me cuz I'm done with classes, but I should probably be studying. 

Am I?

fuck no! .. I'm taking after Noa's science.........

oh.. and thanks to Jen as well for a Monday distraction with listicles.... except my listicle is a little less Christmas Cheer .. and a little more ... fucking balls (that's for you beausaphine). 

  1.  I had a final exam on my birthday…. It was bad…. Very bad….on the plus side? The TA’s are going to get a kick out of all the doodles I did on my scratch paper.
  2. My eye is swollen AGAIN… last week I had a stye on my lower eyelid… and now the inside of my top eyelid is swollen… I’m thinking my eye is trying to tell me I’m ready for vacation
  3. I’ve been fighting a cold for the past few weeks now… I’ll go through days where I feel like I’m going to die .. and then days where I could run a marathon. Make up your mind body!!!!!
  4. The kidlet is also sick this morning.. and has been for the past few weeks… is it wrong to blame him for getting me sick?
  5. Christmas is fast approaching and with every new day I’m finding myself wanting to hide in my room ignoring the fact that it’s Christmas
  6. The bf was supposed to get laundry done while I was off failing my final….. but alas didn’t have any $$ and so I’m having to resort to the panties I don’t like as much……. Come on …tell me holes and overstretched elastic doesn’t turn you on.
  7. With me ignoring the existence of Christmas…. The bf is very excited at the prospect of shopping and I kind of want to punch him every time he mentions it.
  8. I still have 2 more exams to study for but I don’t even have the motivation to get out of bed, let alone get my shit together to go to the library.
  9. I couldn’t fall asleep last night due to my eye and then my anxiety started to kick in making me worry I was going to fail my other finals if I wasn’t able to get it fixed and study… I ended up taking an Ativan to help me sleep
  10. Other than spending my birthday failing my final…… I spent my day riding transit for over 6 hours and then the evening in my room watching movies on my laptop. Do I know how to party or what?

sorry my listicles is kind of depressing...... but it IS monday afterall.


  1. You did a Listicle because of ME?? Yay me!

    I bet you will feel better once your exams are done. Hopefully...?

  2. All of this made me want to make you some soup or some cookies or something. I hope things get better soon, so I don't have to cook and bake.

  3. Ugh...I don't want to think about finals. Or failing. I'm going to cover my ear (eyes) and sing, "alalalalalalallala"

  4. Sweet Jesus my Monday was pretty good then. Now because I care & because I am full of useless information, soak a chamomille tea bag in warm water for 5 minutes, squeeze some of the water out & slap that sucker on your eye. Preferably bandage it to your noggin with some cling film. Leave it there for an hour. Keep doing it every few hours for a couple of days & the sty should fuck right off.

    How do I know this you ask, because I got stys a lot when I was at Uni, & it worked for me.

    Sorry your birthday sucked assholes, your exams are stressing you out & that you have to wear your old Bridget Jones undies.

    You know what makes me feel better. 2 things.
    Chocolate And putting on a favourite song & dacning like a crazy fuck around my house until I'm too exhausted to be sad anymore. OR I cap someone.


  5. I feel for ya: I spent my bday last year failing my final...ok, that's not true, I passed it by 2%. Yeah me. However, if the TAs don't get a kick out of the doodling you did in the sidebars, I did get a kick out of you doing that!

  6. Wow so this listicles thing huh.... man it does sound a bit better than my conversational mondays... at any rate put as hot as you can stand compress on the eye it will help soothe and draw out any yucky stuff. You probably did much better on your exam than you think you did, i like undies with holes super sexy right, kids always make you sick, give the BF a list and make him face the crowds, and finally pour yourself a nice glass of eggnog full of rum and call it a night... you wild party animal you...

  7. ooof that sucks. And wtf is wrong with your boyfriend to WANT to go to stores in this madness?? Bleh!

  8. I lucked out with one final this semester and it was a take home. My kid has math final tomorrow and she's getting a horrible cold. Ughhh.

  9. I don't know about your BF, but holey overstretched underwear turns me on. Feel better chicky!

  10. You definitely know how to party. That's how I party, so it must be cool.

    I also love the term listicle. Now all I have to do is make funny lists. Shit. Why didn't I think of that?

    Hope you feel better!

  11. As an Englishman, can someone please explain the sick idea behind putting any kind of exam, especially an important one, this close to Christmas?? What's wrong with the English idea of having them just before the summer starts so you can then blot them out with two months of summer partying, over-the-top drinking and promiscuity??

  12. Finals and sickness seem to go hand in hand. Oh and blame the kiddo, I blame mine all the time. They are germ infested!!! I hope you are feeling better! Sheesh

  13. I know some home remedies for sties. . . styes?

  14. I've developed a twitch just reading your heinous experience. On the up side, often when you think you have completely f*&ked up an exam, you do better than expected. Good luck.